Monday, December 13, 2010

-finally someones here with the same timezone-

"sleeping early makes a good start" have some panadol u retard!!

a place thats always summer.. weird shit u got there :P

have fun, k bye!

Saturday, December 11, 2010

-red yellow green-

so i havent been blogging for like a week now...  and wow.. can u believe it? im out of australia for almost a month now. but it only feels like yesterday wen i had my stupid go away parties with friends.
 oh hey, look watching tvh atm, and some charity show is on atm. this sand art performance is on. its kinda interesting, should say unpredictable instead. For those who doesnt know what is sand art its something like this basically its just using sand.. to.... do ... art.. =D that explained alot aye i know, no need to thank me hehe 

 anyways. days at hong kong is kinda half fun half boring. fun for the outings ive had and shit coz im staying home and an example of my bordom is exactly what im doing right now.. BLOGGING. you know whats more weird is that im blogging on msn.. for this ... future super hero known as the 'spiderwoman' who assumed got bitten by a spider today and it looked weird.

anyways lets go back to what i wanna talk about today.. is that DUDE, ive been to clubbing twice in hong kong so far, just like Australia, ive been to a alright one (kk) and then i went to a fairly bad one (i wont mention it  ) but yeh... anyways, ill tell u how bad it is man... first thing i walked into this shitty club yesterday was that everyone was soo fcking young rage from 16-19 year olds..WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?! yes i heard its held by high skool people but comeon,, i didnt expect to see ppl underage to be there == thats just dirty... wat makes it worse is that i cud describe the club with 3 things: HOOKING UP, WHITE FEVER and SHIT DJ.

okay hooking up: i think at this generation later then us is all about getting the bitches and just ... sex   they where srsly grinding HARD and just sexing on the dance floor. what makes it worse is that the dance floor is already small and u with no dobt ull get some butt contact   but also white sweaty arms that drags along back >< lol one of my friend also got burnt by a lit cigerette held by a whore while getting grinded on.. == just fck get a room, clubbing isnt like that u fcuking kids ==''

 white fever: okay i gota admit, there were some alright looking girls in the club, i like some and i got some -cha ching to me  - but apart from that... the other good looking ones are like... all over these seedy lanky white dudes.. like Oh EM geE!! no not the song but OMG becoz it was just horrible to even look at... they are everywhere. all the place we go to in the club, no EVERY CORNER
 in the club we will see white fevers... dudE TT

SHIT DJ: dude that dj to start of is a fcking young lil afro white dude that cant even dj! man your fucking white, ur ment to be good at DJING ==' the musik was soo shit.. it wasl ike slow TECHNO   WHAT THE FUCK?! the whole night we just tottally gave that dj shit and I, I PERSONALLY ASKED FOR LIKE A G6 to be played but NO! even tho that kient answered me he will put it on but it never came on! SOO DISAPPOINTED.. we left at 1.30 to get maccas. hah, that ws like the highlight of the day. shit thing is that we didnt have nothing else to do after we ate and regret ripping up the tag to get bak into the club TT we we've just drank for a bit more ><

overall... it was a shit experience.. my friend gave me shit for bringing them to a shit club == gosh i wont fcking trust my hk friend anymore.. shes a let down FUCK!

 tmr better be better as i will going to a all girls night (free entry for girls) club and it shall make things better ~~

-ps. ideas of these blog inspired by K.T.~
song of the day: gazette - pledge

Thursday, December 2, 2010

-defrost these feelings-

its quite clear that im not a very nice person aye. i dont even know why im doing such things for a friend. i really treasured the time we spent together, it was very fun, i enjoyed every moment. i cant stop thinking about wat ive done. im not sure if its correct but im absolutely sure i did something wrong. friendship is somthing that u cant give it a try to see if ur capable of having. its not like cigerettes where u can try once then quit it for the rest of ur life. friendship is somthing that when its broken once, its gone; even if there will be a chance of friends to regain the trust, but a scar is already left there. the promise does not exist anymore, atleast not as strong.
ive been betrayed and i have also betrayed someone. either way it doesnt feel good at all. being hurt feels like u cant do anything about what has happen and hurting someone feels like your just one hell of a dick.
i have to say to you however: the nights we had cud be a play, but i do treasure the happy times we had together. you may now think that im a total jerk, but to me, your always that little girl that made me happy thruout my night times wen i cudnt sleep while thinking about my past. thank you very much. you gave me a very good time. i will never forget you nor our past. yes im not a sweet person, but atleast im trying my best to express my true feelings and i promise you, these stuff I just said is all from me. not from anyone else. sorry is all i can say now. i owe you too much i cud not explain.. sorry girl..
song of day: And - Anemone

Tuesday, November 30, 2010


Pinch and a Punch for the first of the Month, WHITE RABBITs :)

so ive been to macau! the kindom of casino.NO i didnt see 2pm and shit.. they left  before i stepped into their hotel TT. i swear my sistah was gonna get me tix for their MAMA concert.. but NO, sis didnt tell me that shes getting it until the live show actually airing ==' fck... but apart from that... its my first time being in a casino. it srsly aint that bad. everything look soo pro. the dealers are like WOAHHHH professional much? and i swear they dont smile ==. everythings soo serious... anyways.. had 5 meals yesterday and 4 meals today. i think i really am getting fat like a .. little fat bitch..

im back in guang zhou today. my days seems fcking long ass now.. waking up at 9ish 10 sleeping at 3,4 am... days seems a lot longer. i wanna go back to aussie lah. but again i havent done enuff shopping. so far i only spend 300 hk on this jacket, not becoz i like it, becoz its fcking damn cold ==' dont know why this time im back im actualyl spending a lot less.. i rmr last time i came back i spent like 1 grand on the first day...maybe ill start shopping tmr as im going closer to the city into shopping malls.. hehehe... *must rmr to conserve money* NOT =P

so... wat i have to say is that. im trying, i know i will achieve what i want.. i will not leave u hanging!!! meow~

Friday, November 26, 2010

-think, think, THINK-

okay, must avoid dramas! i must think right, this is like my only chance... what im about to do this will either make everything go right, or once again put an end to another chapter of my life. please.. i wanna know what to do.. someone help me... i dont wanna think about it. i know i cant do this on myself either! i dont wanna make the wrong decision and fck everything up. i cant sleep!!! i dont no how to start from either. how should i approach this whole situation.. how should i begin so i will have this all plan our in the future.. why does this kinda shit always come back at me but in a poorer form each time TT..

Sunday, November 14, 2010

-'tired' of 'tried'

like who in the world thinks of this world as a fair world? im the first one who doesnt. at this moment, i should have a smile on my face no later then the coming week becoz ill be free from stress, love, conflict and memories. 

so much has happend this past week, one week that i actually remembered what happend every single day. all were pretty hard to go through. many status changes, many ups but mostly downs. people that i still have to thank, people who i still could not forget and people who i cudnt decide to consider friends or not. but this shall all end once and for all. too much for me to think lately, was even at a stage where i was digesting somthing but having extra shit stuffed down my system for me to collapse.

time please come by faster, i want to escape!! give me a break~ 

tired now, very tired of this situation. i spent a countless amount of time reflecting what has happend. i have solutions that will solve the problem but go against my will, and solutions that will also solve the problem but hurt myself more. 

*loading* yes i got it ^^

Monday, November 8, 2010

-words that cant be said-

ahhhhh this is killing me already. just only 2 days.. fcukkk, im being drowned by my own emotions, dont know what to think off. what can i do? what can i do? 

ur updates is very cute... this is all i can say... i cant stop looking at it.. TT

Sunday, October 31, 2010

-To Do List-

back to hong kong
kimmy's 18th
get my Green P's
 clubbing in hong kong
finish uni
2 exam
eat chocolate cookies
jailbreak my iphone
end of year klub kanky
watch jackass 3D
my go away party 
 find a gf
save up $3000 for hk
learn Richard Clayderman's ballade pour adeline
learn Richard Clayderman Voyage a Venice

Sunday, October 24, 2010

-constructing a life here-

havent really blogged much lately, not much about myself anyways so might aswell do some updating.

'nelson hung wants to be a girl' is my latest fb status

so i only have 2 more exams to do and ill be like off the hook again. 3 months away from the biggest island on earth. srsly dont wanna be back here, excluding my friends, i srsly wudnt choose to live here anymore. too much bad news. rather stay with lil old daddy. this place is soo boring. 

bachelar of Arts in UQ or GU next year.. hah, havent even thought about majoring in what. of cause im not the studying type so im not seeing myself doing law, or pharm or w/e hardcore subjects.. might just stick with german, ofcoz... and japanese? srsly the reason why i want to learn jap is for the girls to watch anime without reading sub-titles.. lol srsly.. i HATE reading subtitles, always gets me off guard and forget wats the storyline tlking about..

SNSD's third mini singles back next week and im very very exited ^^ bout time i have some happy music to listen to, after a series of 2pm, b2st, ft island depressing genres.

i havent talk to you for a while now, how are u? are u annoyed at me.. still? i wanna tlk to u, but i dont wan to bother u, just before i go, see me once more? 

song of the day: Shimatani Hitomi - Perseus

Saturday, October 23, 2010

-tap tap-

did anyone see the moon from last night? it was like sooooo bigggg.

i dont have a life, ich habe keinen leben.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

-these weird moments again-

okay dude, wake up, she isnt gonna be here since the past, she wudnt be here now NOR she wud be here in the future. dont you just get the fact that shes only treating you as a friend? wake up. it wont work waiting for her. why are u so stupid? it happens to you all the time, grow up! and snap out of it. you WONT be treated the same way you treated them. this is just not how life goes. its an unfair and untrustworthy world. she isnt worth the time, just let go, look for someone else. Please dont crave to talk to them on the phone, please dont double click on their e-mail in msn and dont make any thoughts about them in ur head, becoz they DONT care about you. When your thinkin about her, she is thinking about her lover, not you. who do you think you are to even worth them thinking? so what if you were close with her? it doesnt change the fact that shes actually taken or simply has no heart towards you? dreams over.. hopefully. stand up again. this is just pointless if you are gonna continue this pointless wait. you wont find your answer. make yourself clear that you have to start walking forward. dont get layed back. its not good for you. not for your time. your life is way more precious then spending it on hopeless love. just give up. i beg you. please, dont look back. she'll NEVER be with you and thats a fact.

song of the day: 2PM - I'll Be Back

last presentation
one more assignment
2 exam 

Sunday, October 10, 2010

-pick up urself again-

aftering talking to her tonight I feel like I'm not the only one disppointed in what happend previously.. she doesn't deserve this much shit.. not that she deserve any. It's so unfair.. using someone's property with no respect. how can you actually do that? you really need some sense hit into you, its not the first time aswell. but i shall not mention something happend that far ago. back to recent; why does she have to suck all the shit in when you enjoy the moments? why does she have to encounter all these problems when you crack up jokes and laugh along with your friends? and also, to you other ones out there who contributed in fcking up the night for her, please have some respect for her as you guys should've known better. what you guys did was unessessary, unpleasent, unfriendly and unreliable. I personally call this the 4U's. 

as for you my dear friend, please dont get too cut at these people, they aint worth it. they should be the one coming to apologize  to you. if they dont, it shows that you dont even have to bother considering them as 'close' friends. and my dear friend, im really sorry for last night, i really wasnt in a good mood and what i witnessed at the party made it worse. i tried my best not putting it on my face but i cudnt help it. really sorry. even tho i dont think you will ever read this post, but if you do, i really do mean what i say. i know, its not my position to say all these stuff and I cud be wrong at a point but this is how i see it. i wont allow anyone to come and hurt ur feelings and i certiainly wont forgive who did what to you. i dont want to see you frown or tear. this break up for you cud mean a new life and please, dont think for a sec that its your fault. stay strong!

please forget what has happend last night, only rmr the good moments and continue with your life with no regrets.

and to answer your question properlly, I really don't know, I try not to think about it because I know I dont stand a chance, so why think about something that wont happend?

song of day: Gazette - Hesitating Means Death

Monday, October 4, 2010

-What Nelson and Ryan thinks about SEX?- (Rated MA 15+)

Nelzon says:
*sex is like an instrument to me, i practice it everyday and i like the sounds produced by it.

Ryan says:
*sex is meant to be sacred each time, but i just want to get my dick wet 90% of the time

Nelzon says:
*sex isnt just a game, its a drug. at first, its really hard to get into but once u get use to it, u cant stop.

Ryan says:
*before my first time, my friends would always talk about getting just getting pussy, i always thought it was really rude.. but once i did it, it's just like an addiction, i just want more and more.

Nelzon says:
*sex is not a term im very familiar with until grade 9, before that, i thought that couples will get granted a baby by jesus straight after marrage. lolz

Ryan says:
*i still dont understand why guys like to lick fuck touch pussy, for me.. it's really all about that boobs, i seem to have more fun with boobs then pussy.

Nelzon says:
*i really hate those ppl who claims that they cant have sex until getting married. coz i know alot who says that and already had sex.

Ryan says:
*the advice i'd give to people that haven't had sex is to make sure it's with someone you love and care about, becuase the first time is really something special and shouldn't be wasted on someone random.

Nelzon says:
*sex is really important in everyone's life i guess, if not relating sexually, for ppl who loves kids wud consider it like everyday i rkn. its also another way to keep urself fit.

Ryan says:
*it's sad to see that a lot of 12 to 14 year olds are having sexy, back then i was playing with friends or going out bmx riding, not playing with a chicks vagina and tits.. these days kids just think its the "Cool" thing to do...

Nelzon says:
*sometimes i will think that girls are much smarter than guys in regards to sex becoz of ur fast twitch thinking systems haha, but i shall explore the truth myself :)

Friday, October 1, 2010

-again and again-

pretty hecktic night at lulu's 18th masquerade party. however, one thing tho, there must be a proper DJ next time! it was pretty pumped i suppose. flash lights, those lazer beams, loud music (exclude the fcked up bass) was awesome. however those flash lights gave me an 'zap' feeling, got me dizzy and blind X_X.

Chungstah was there with me the whole night, speshal thanks to him, fanks for driving me to the venue, thanks for the long and comfortable D&M. i really cant ask for more. you are truely a true truely truthful trustworthy friend bro of mine. thanks for your support x3 i really didnt know wat to do if u werent there tonight hahaha.. 

srsly. without you, i wudnt know how to deal with her. like srsly.. wat is the chance of her being at the same damn party.. must be fate ==' destiny says i have to see her fcking face. she i swear she is everywhere! plaza, QUT, UQ, PARTIES.. srsly. fck me good. lolz. i gess tonight ill have extra thigns to think about hahaha. 

dude, im hungry atm,, and tlking about it now.. I THOUGHT I LOST MY FCKING WALLET MAN ==' I spent like 30 minutes looking for it and kinda just gave up, sat down on a chair, heads down thinking wtf is going on. btw thanks for all the ppl who helped looking for my wallet aye ==' 5 minutes later -recieves text- "Hey Nelson, I found ur wallet, Why is it in my jacket?" lolz fail... i totally fort i putted my wallet in my jacket but instead, i left it at Kenji's by accident.. silly me lol... i didnt wanna risk my P's and drive home  without my lic so again, thanks for Daniel for driving me straight home ==.. i owe u too much aye.

AND finally becoz of my wallet which had my Big Mac voucher in it, i CUDNT FCKING DRIVE TO MACCAS AND GET MY BIG MAC >< fml.. im soo hungry..... already ate like 4 egg rolls.. what else is in the house for me to eat.. or do i just sleep it off..... FML!! =[

songs of the night: B2ST - Soom/ Usher - Dj's Got Us Fallin In Love Again.

Monday, September 27, 2010


If i can change the alphabet,
I'll put U&I together ;)

Sunday, September 26, 2010


Happy Birthday KT.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

-asking asking asking-

man im soo tired. i got an exam in less than 12 hrs and im still up not thinking about doing work. why do i always do stupid things. spending time, money, stemina and sleep on useless matters. another night im staying up till 3,4 thinking about shit like should i wait for her? will she really care if i wasnt here waiting? of coz she never really cared, but tbh i dont expect her to, im really her nobody plus we only meant for a lil while.. why am i being so dramatic again. i shud be over all these stupidity. i dont want to think about stuff that is too much for me to handle. its just not somthing someone like me wud deserve to experience.. im not good enuff, nor i am worth it. the differences is that i am not the ideal type of her.. luckily i try not to show it anymore anyways... 

i had a big cry infront of the boys the other day at a party, thats when i actually realised what alc can make you do; but ofcoz thats not the only thing i realised, i also acknowledged the ones who are around me at that time was the ones that actually cared about me. i swear i've never begged for mercy in that way ever in my life.. i begged for help, support, and asking why is it still so unfair after soo long. i brought up the past 3 years again. it gave me alota queries in which i have to ask myself again and again, is what im doing atm right? is what im ignoring going to achieve anything in the future and is the things ive done gonna pay off.. 

well 'devil may cry' im assure that nel nel can also cry, but that shall only be one of those execption times where i can do so to express how i feel. tearing isnt really the solution.. yet i cant find a better one. hah.. that night totally gave me a chance to release everythhing i had inside me. i shall just hope and forget... however right now, i just wanna get things straight.. straighter than before anyways.. is that what can i really do now? how do you feel? i dont want to ask you this q. coz i know i dont have the right to atm.. its killing me >< this waiting feeling is certainly not a good friend of mine.

song of the day :  Nightcore - 7 Years and 50 Days. my grade 10 fav song.  (sorry cudnt find the original ver. by Cascada but its as good ^^)

ps. thanks Steve Pang, Ryan Hampson and others who are at the party on Saturday who shared my tears with. 

Thursday, September 16, 2010

-lonely 18-

i guess this will have to go all the way back to riverfire. since grade nine, I have been watching the fireworks by myself. I remeber that K wasnt allowed out but was also watching the fireworks at home directly accross from southbank. It was a very long time, but just dont know why I still ahve these kinda stupid things in mind. Then in grade 10, i think it was meant to be with C but she stayed home instead, she isnt those outing ppl so yeh.. it wasnt a supice she end up not coming, all i got from that night was just tlking to her on the phone whilst watching the fireworks. grade 11 was J, however she had her other half with her and of cause i will have no chance to watch it with her. that jealousy feeling still remains here and it does not feel good. grade 12 which is last year, riverfire was a total mess, S was there, that night i just dont even wanna think about anymore. it is really weird. its all misunderstand but even though, i know that ive caused most of it. im such a 拖累。。lastly, this year, I thought K would turn up but she just cant be fcked at all. she stayed home and enjoyed her Kpops, she only realised it was riverfire when the jets went past... hah... very very very fcked. every year resulted in the same way. next year's i really dont look forward to it and dont want to go.

why is it so unfair? am i not working hard enough? did i caused disaster in my past life that resulted me in such a low stage? people that i see in my eyes does not turn around, where as people who have me in their eyes I did not care. it isnt a good situation. always alone at last. yes today is my 18th. everyone was very happy, camera flashes, happy birthday song, kisses and brothers. but afterall, on the way home is just me and my car + some visuel kei. the one that i really thought about the whole day i did not hear from. was ist das? please make me feel more useful? please show me what i really am? what im capable of? such a weak person i am i see in the mirror. K, what do you really think about in your mind? I dont get you. how do you feel about me? am i annoying? and why do you have to know him.. this birthday was really great at the start, i even got a hug from R which i never fort i wud ever have the chance since primary. but K, why do i have to see him on your profile.. i dont want anything to do with this anymore. rescue me 可以吗?K, pick up your phone.. are you actually not busy but just annoyed... please make me realise what i am missing out on..

ps. thanks for everyone's comment on fb, txt, and confrontation ^^

song of the day: Sadie - Swallow Rain

Monday, September 13, 2010


2EN.EE1 dance cover

Friday, September 10, 2010

-looking at her-

she is soo bored that i have to write a bored to describe how bored it is.... so anyways... she is just lying there doing jack shit... i really like wanna push her off the chair. she is gay...... she has somthign to play with, but she doesnt seem to be saatisfied.. she looks stressed / tired. her hands are fat =] i dont no why is she lying there.. she can just go sleep.. ==' okay my shitty habits kicking in again... im just gonna type w/e that comes to my head... she just sat up.... looking up at the screen and back at the bird straight away... a song just played that totally made me fink back into the past... OMFG ==' i shall make her suffer for everything ... i wanna eat her alive. smile smile smile... i hate seeing ur dead look...... 
why do i look sooo different in grade 11 ==

Thursday, September 9, 2010

-looking forward for these coming weeks-

Gazette, finally produce somthing worth my time to download and enjoy since their single 'Distress and Coma'. Haha, funny, their songs called RED but im writing in blue.. a pretty big contrast. but dw, the love for them shall continue from this point onwards :) 

Reita's (bass)hair is so much cooler. The fact that he has a nose band is hot enuff but DUDE, now hes also got a head band.. woahh ^^ its not longer blonde blonde, but it really suits him i gess. this guy gives me a misterious feeling. i really wonder wats hiding behind that band..
then we have our drummer, kai. he is actually becoming alot more attractive. despite that his drum skill is very awesome, he seems to be more appealing than wat he was in the past. his hair also changed alot. at a point, he had alota extentions but now, simply natural but carries a sense of ohrah with him xP
up next is Mr Uruha, dude, i honestly dont no how to pronounce his name, OO-ROO-Ha? haha but anyyways hes very awesome, his hair changes all the time. in 'Shivers' his hair was ultra long and was all pushed to the front giving a megawavy look, however in this one, it looks more straight and clean. reminds me of that red hair guy from final fantasy but dont no his name =P. i ike his jacket too.. omfg.. i wanna go japan!!!
 totally cant miss Aoi, his guitar skill is wow.. facinating. this shall make him one of my fave guitarist. before, i didnt know why he has like a 2in1 guitar but now.. i still dont no wats its called but i know why he has it :P he is less attractive than the other few but i wudnt mind him to be my big brother :) 
 lucky last, we have vocalist RUKI! he is BLONDE AGAIN!!! he suits blonde more i rkn, this clean straight  spikey hair was wat he had back in the past wen hes younger. hes voice is very unique. it is so strong! power! dynamic! have i told u that his tatoo is also amazing.. its located below his chin and along his neck just like nails thursting thru his skin~ wow.. SEXY!
 overall, gazette had made me happy with this album thats why i decided to dedicate a whole blog for them =] NOT.. :P well now some of my own shit~

listening exam for german in 2 weeks exactly. bday comes in 1 week exactly. reiji is 1 day after my bday should i go? i shall decide later. however there is a higher chance of me going to the halloween KK cosh those kients want me to go dance with them. and YES just dancing :P not thinking about getting girls at this moment :P 

mum decided to put a bed in this computer room for brother, so therefore i cant stay up late anymore skyping with friends. fml~ well i kinda didnt care last night and got lil bro pissed.. oh wellz.. =D ill try aviod it, if i cant.. too bad!!

parties are coming up, i shall get wasted even provided i have exams coming up. oh wellz fck it :P worry about it later. but one enemy still currently infront of me everynight. 'inosmnia' its soo effed? like srsly.. let me sleep ==' i just seem to thinkn of shit every night wen i get off the comp and jump on bed. i hear the highway, cars speeding; the wind clashing in and hitting my window; homestays from next door walking around going to toilet; that tempt which wants me to check my phone once in a while.. hah.. i wan it to stop.. some say to use pills.. but i dont do drugs == dont wanna get addicted... maybe i need a old method of tlking on the phone and get tired from that.

kkk... no more. im done for today =D

Song of the Day: Gazette - Red 

Monday, September 6, 2010

-wat pisses me off-

the process of changing ink for my printer.
*i hate it wen the tv doesnt work
*i hate it wen salinas playing dumb
*or actually am dumb
*i hate it wen my printer goes outa ink
*cosh i gota refill it
*and refilling it takes shitloads of time..
*i gota open the printer cover
*then the protective screen
*then i have to wait for the ink to slowly move out
*then i gota unlock the safety belt
*then get the black in out
*and i gota make sure itsn ot hte colour one
*i gota walk to the draw
*and get a new one out
*and i gota make sure ive got a black ink instead of colour ink out
*then i gota open
*and opening it is soo hard
*that i have to find a pair of scissors
*to cut thru it
*then get a big enuff hole
*to slide the ink out
*THEN i gota use incredible hulk stregth to open the cap of the ink
*then have to aim it in the printer properlly
*then put it in and make sure that it doesnt get mixed with the colour ink
*lock it up
*put the safetly belt back on
*then the screen
*then the printer cover
*then i gota press
*the okay button
*to say that ive change ink
*but it will ask me ifi have changed the black
*or colour ink
*i gota press no for colour
*and yes for black
*if i mix it up it iwll just wont work?
*and just keep the data it orginallly have
*SO after i click the right one
*i gota wait for it to load 5 minutes THEN i can print again.

Friday, September 3, 2010

-Dancing from the start-

Lucifer Dance cover lah~

Thursday, September 2, 2010


mission failed

-the start-

it was that moment, that kiss that tiggled my heart. on the way home, i thought and thought and thought, it got my crazy. i hata sing crazy while driving home.. i really dont know.. im getting a msg from you that makes me fink that u might feel the same.. but i dont no if its true or am i being dramatic about it again. it has happend so much. these mistakes ive had from the past resulted in what i became now. i want to show you what i really am, but the theme isnt at its best fit.. i need to see you ... tell you in person, dont want any misunderstanding. i hope the following weekend will give me an asnwer. if thing goes as anticipated, i shall make a move when the dark sky becomes colourful..

Monday, August 30, 2010


its better not to say to much, sometimes it backfires right atchu

writing as im going so dont bother correcting me, ull go for ages. at tops, you look like someone i know. good looking ^^ i do actualyl cherish those moments but then again ive told you i rather not meeting you from the start. atleast it will give u less trouble. i intend to make a good friend, but end up falling in a dark room with no way out. by critiquing my actions, i can prove to myself that i am a fool. one fool that will give up alot for someone like you. a naive kid. wat do u have that others dont? i dont no.. its all past. i dont care way happens in the future, im down for w/e. rmr sitting next to you at the busstop, asking you wtf is going on. i really rmr that day. it is very windy. u stayed silent. until now ur still silent. i will expect ionno, idm and idc. i wud wan to make a change, but ur not giving me the chance to. this feeling of wanting to get hurt even more makes me high.. heh.. i wonder how much time will i sustain this. i dont no my feelings for u, its on and off. i dont want a true feeling anymore. i rather it stay like this as it will not affect neither of us. im being annoying i understand. it shall fade. i want it to fade as fast as the passing of this 18 years. i want to develop my own way of communication with the forest. listen to insects, listen to the trees, listen to this powerful environment; by myself. i wud want to dig a hole in between this two palm trees and bury myself in it to give me time to think about my future. kid, u make me happy, you make me feel guilty, u make me feel dumb, u had made me feel differently everyday. right now i feel pale. actually i wud also want to make u feel happy, but i know ive already achieved that ages ago. but i wud also wan to piss u off by saying 'give me my kfc now' >=) and ull go fck yu.. hah.. i like it wen u smile. i like it wen u get angry at me.. cosh u never do.. right now ill say to you: fuck you too!

song of the day: Yoona - Innisfree Day

Sunday, August 29, 2010


these bunch of kients.. hahaha luv them aye xD one of my fav song back in school days! might aswell lemmi do it withchu guys next time, im bored shitless aswell.

Anihuz, i dont wanna startt my assessment.... its due friday.. FCK uni.... exams are coming soon aswellll.... *BRAIN DEAD*

What to not do when you get dc out of msn:
1. do not rage
2. do not break anything near you
3. do not swear
4. do not tell me how piss you are because im as pissed cause i cudnt fcking talk you
5. do not try fixing it becoz it normally wont work
What to do when you get dc out of msn:
1. remain calmed
2. you can txt/call me instead
3. go listen to SNSD on your ipod
4. have an apple
5. think about sleeping earlier since ur nets fcked
6. go to the kitchen and make some bubble tea
7. just leave your comp, it shall eventually go fine after a while~

 Shall start learning SID's Rain cosh i have so much time i spend doing jackall.

Song of the Day: Shinee - Lucifer, she loves this song ~

Thursday, August 26, 2010

-random shit-

a cunt night with my boiz at ants house. fcuking bored cuntssssss.....

^^ happy for one day!

Sunday, August 22, 2010

-when facing death-

Black Butler II takes on a gothic, supernatural vibe. But rather than carry it out with vampires or the like, this anime uses butlers and creepy boys.
Alois, one of the focal characters in this episode of the anime, acts like a brat, and a viewer might wish she could call him just that. He does small attempts to infuriate Claude like unbuttoning a shirt so that Claude must do it again, but he also commits acts of greater cruelty. He purposely tricks a maid into looking straight at him, just so he can punish her by jabbing out her eye with his own finger.

When the guests arrive, Alois uses emotive tricks to make them feel sorry for him. These same affectations are attempted on the viewer, but not only are most emotional scenes entirely overwrought (Alois screaming "Nooooo!" in a flashback), the viewer can't help but remember Alois's disgustingly cruel act. If viewers are supposed to feel sorry for him, it's not working.

Claude has an exceptional lack of personality. Stoicism seems to be the only trait the anime creators gave the new butler, and while this might be meant to make him mysterious and appealing to the fan girls, it really just makes Claude boring.
The rest of the Black Butler II cast is also dull, or just annoying. The priest and Alois's "uncle" make no impression on the viewer, and the viscount is sickeningly flamboyant. They serve to purpose in the anime's plot aside from getting Claude to show off his magical butler powers, which certainly could have been done without them.

Black Butler II doesn't become exciting until the second half, when original anime's butler, Sebastian, makes an appearance. There is something he wants from the Trancy basement, and a fight ensues between him and Claude when his identity is discovered. This was surprising, as the opening sequence makes it appear as though Claude and Alois take center stage in this anime. Time will tell how Sebastian and Ciel play into Black Butler II.
(obtain from

A souless body does not redeem itself..

I wonder what is it like to die? Looking in darkness with fear shall get me no where; yet sorrow settles in as death slowly arrives. Does heaven and hell exist? Will I be dragged down to hell regards the misfortunes I've practiced throught life.

Song: Black Butler- Kalafina

Friday, August 20, 2010

-redeem myself-

just wished the vid can be edited.. movie maker failed to run on vista
fun night with my boiz~
thanks kevin for shouting me dinner the first time
come back soon mum,  get me some clothes from hk
hello anthony, see u tonight at the party ;)
when will x Japan release their rest of the remainding live?
will johnny wang be able to get enuff ppl to go have a dance jam tmr?
how many sleeps will i have tonight?
skiped uni again on a friday for the 3rd week in a row, shall better get back to it and start my essay..
we have to learn to luv ur haters becoz that'll piss them off more :P
after seeing u ppl today, i wanna have gf :L
sometimes i didnt realise holding ur piss in was soo painful :(
oi jing, its okay, girls are just girls, they come and go.
"if you want me to treat you nice, atleast show me if ur worth it or not"
lucifer by shinee, good song :) -learning dance cover- =]
its raining last night and i had a dream, it was about hailing :O
sorry hayden for nearly killing u last night while waving at u in the car >__< damn it was close, that car just stopped right infront of u leaving like a 30cm gap between u and the other car..
cant wait for sid/sadie's new single! September <3

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

-boring tuesday-

so tan wasted his cone so we took a foto of it.

i realised i didnt have uni today after waking up and was about to walk into my shower. i went yumcha instead. this lil guy. my good friend. hes 4, name is BOWEN or something well its prounounce as that anyway.

also, planned something for my 18. heh..

Sunday, August 15, 2010

X JAPAN @World Tour in YOKOHAMA,8/14/10

Jade (Intro)
Forever Love

Endless Rain

Unfinished / X (with Taiji)

Born to be Free

Say Anything

Rusty Nail / Sugizo + Pata solo!

Tears (closing)

(i do not own this, all for entertainment reasons)

-chaos back to tasteless-

how weird.. when i woke up, i felt this tingling feeling. im not very good at expressing myself. i had an clueless introduction, furious body and a miserable conclusion. i couldnt turn back at the time, i didnt look clearly. my mistakes again, my ignorance, all backfired on me with a whole heap of regret and shame. im struggling as i was hiding under my blankets, scared of facing the truth again. it stings even thinking about it. i could not resist this pain. this 'confused' feeling i got is actually what i have to cope with. why can i make my life easier for myself. this is getting no where. why struggle to walk this 悲伤路. apart from sorry, i dont know what to say.

y'know i really enjoyed the past two nights.. that feeling feels like the ones we had since last year.. me being a stupid clown on the street and ur the only audience who wud watch and laugh at my random jokes..

i wish this vid happens to me also.. let me wake up..

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

-sky is falling--

Delore - Reborn
ive actually never heard this band before, but they seem to be nice guys :)

anyways, hello. FEEL LIKE USING RED TODAY. i wanna you to really see whats infront of you.. all of you actually.. the things you are missing out. the ones that love u and the ones that will not give u good future. for those who are living a blindly life, open ur eyes. please dont rkn im just gonna be a puppet and let u yell at me wenever u feel like, im here to tell u kunts that its fcking enuff. who the ffck do u think you are to yell at me like this? dont see me doing it to u wen ur the actual one who started it. try to fcking take a joke for once, and learn from me; to chill down. plus its not even a right place for u tonight to yell shit to us like this, its a fcking event and u ruined it for everbody. 

i honestly dont no why the hell u will just target at me, maybe cosh i bearly 'yell' back at u wen u give me the shit that i cant take. but from now on, ill just ignore u man, srsly if u didnt do wat u did today, ill still erase the stuff uve said to me from the past, but as for now, ill rmr every single word that comes out from ur mouth which contains language that u used against to be pay me out and shuve it all back at ur face. ur not much better dude, i treat as u best mate and u end up giving me this shit? fck off.

 i wish things were just like the past..

Monday, August 9, 2010



Friday, August 6, 2010


i had really made a big fool of myself. i see this world more clearer. it seems dark and dull.. (CAUSEITSFUCKING12INTHEMORNINGUFUCK) no... everything is soo crucial. anger. revenges, jealousy, obsession, grave is the final destination. things that have been around me for almost a quater of my life has slowly revealed its true identity. it discusses me. I would like to get rid of this thing from my life as soon as possible. this leech, shall leave this world and make a better use of itself.

it actually concerns me when this comes to a matter of disturbance and irratation. how about dig a hole and bury urself in it? things that hasnt revealed to me directly has already indirectly left a big scar right on my forehead. stop trying to or being so naive and make a change to ur life. many things that has changed, you should change too. 討厭的傢伙。我要你死無葬身之地!heh... this feels good.. i will so make my life better without this egotistical character out of my story.

i tried controling this feeling for months now. it sure doesnt stop here. it has to be set free. this is just rediculous. memories does not equal to future. and ur future however does get reflected from ur past. for someone(s), make up ur fcking mind. i could not stand this one more single day + 1 anymore. this feeling can distinguish right now.

土.土.土 these graves are the meant for you people. make urself feel comfortable.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

-gloomy nights-

its actually a 
scary night..

金天是她的生日。 但他却不经张,而我比她还要激动。 好笑吗? 我可能有点儿夸张, 但并不是我在证明什么。 作为一个朋友, 我开心是当然的, 作为一个傻瓜, 我只是想你开心。 我不会理会到你对我的feel是什么。 我刚才说的都是废话。 哈哈~无聊,doesnt make sense to me.....


Monday, August 2, 2010

-these questions arnt from my mind-

10 day bestfriend challenge ;
01. 5 facts about your bestfriend
02. A picture of you and your bestfriend
03. Write a list of things you and your bestfriend like to do together
04. Write a letter to your bestfriend
05. When and how did you and your bestfriend meet?
06. How often are you and your bestfriend together?
07. Favorite thing to do together
08. When was the last time you and your bestfriend hung out?
09. Does your bestfriend live close to you or far away?
10. Do you and your bestfriend have an abbriviation for your friendship(like, Bff, Bffl, exc)?

Person 1: Alex Ho Hoi Yeung
Fact 1: he just got his P's
Fact 2: works at a bucher shop 
Fact 3: he hates his family and wanna move out
Fact 4: he wud like his partner to yell "Ah, LEXY" while having sex
Fact 5: hes gay wenever hes single
Thats the best i cud find =='

We like to do:
-maximum tune
-talk about girls
-discuss our future
-bs on msn when we're bored
-make UHHHH sounds whenever we feel like it.
-swear at each other like how we normally communcate.

Skipping 4&7&8's for all my friends.
Met this cunt in grade 2, my neibour class.

Twice a week

He lives piss far from me now cosh hes a pussy.

A.N. asshole :)

yes, im bored.. just like you.. in uni i took random photos :)
ment to concentrate at the projector :) not the bra strap of this random classmate :) :)

and i was gonna make a finger shuffle video but my movie maker effed up so .. yeh.. heres the original copy...
interesting aye :)

Song of the Month: Kana Nishino - If

Friday, July 30, 2010

-mummy's ruined bday-

Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday to mummy,
Happy birthday to you.
these are the lines ive missed out today. it should be happy night, but it all got ruined by me and my emo'ztions. -thinking about uni- -thinking about shit-

Thursday, July 29, 2010

-about you n I-

*i just ate apple
*im turning 18 soon
*mums bday's tmr
*i like the song ‘if' by kana nishino
*i dont have a nick name, apart from nel nel
*i make my own breakfast and supper, salami sandwich
*i pick the best looking girls to check out
*i have 1 sistah
*and my brother is fat
*i make impossible to maybe
*i had once a girl mad me stars but ending up breaking her heart on valentines day
*i used to love nokia phones
*i still have gatsby to sell
*i like watching video tapes than dvdd becoz they are more easy to handle
*my car's a jazz, its black
*im honky
*mums from hk, dads from china
*mums christian
*dads buddaism
*i dont really believe in anything
*i choose to watch kamen rider even tho its a kids thing
*poke a mon was my fav show on cheeze tv
*i really dont like making friends with black people
*im a emo
*i think i cant blow a big balloon even with 3 big puff
*ive never smoked
*i can make a doggy face with my hands
*even tho im eating apple
*im also drinking apple juice tea
*im aiming for 170 before i stop growing
*if i say smile, she will always do.
*i have 6 speakers connected to my computer
*im gonna copy and paste all these on my blog
*my formal happend last year, i was the highlight with phillip kang cosh we danced on the stage and got everyone pumping
*i dont no much aus/ american celebrities
*my auntie just gave up on the bicycle machine thingo after 10 minutes even wen she set her goal for 15minutes
*i always wonder how can birds fly but they cant fly backwards
*i had once mixed up my uncle as my dad and sat on his lap wen i was 5

and her..

*i got majorly pissed of in the morning
*but i get happy when im around my friends
*when teahcers think theyre topshit, it pisses me off
*i wagged and felt really bad but still.
*got home and ate cookies ._.
*i just finished maths hwk
*and obviously havent been bothered to shower
*i love the colour pink
*i like to steal peoples pens cause i write better like that *<>
*i like.. love baskteball too ._.
*my phone is like.. air.
*to me >_>
*i like to live in the past, so ive been told :]
*i think i look more mature with my hair tied up ._.
*oh. i hate violence :]
*and smokers.
*cause they remind me of my uncle :]
*and i grew up with my other uncles lame magic
*my familys fcked up
*oh. i get majorly pissed off at the smallest things
*but then i get over them pretty quickly, in my opinion :]
*i eat while doing hwk. it helps alot
*and music :D
*i hate violin. obviously.
*i will literally suicide if i dont pass my next amus exam
*i know some backstabbers..
*cept they act all nice to my faceee
*and it pisses me off.
*but i gota live with it

-bit of a recap of wats going on-

ual ydna wonk i | i know andy lau
[= | =]
riafnu oos si efil | life is soo unfair
noitulos a rof gnikool llits | still looking for a solution

mm i forgot to give anthony his usb back again. ahh im soo forgetful. (chicks will go, SILLY ME) Anthony, FCK YOU! yeh :) if u ever red this blog, im srsly not gay, and NO im not blogging about you so u dont have to read on :) its just a reminder for me to get ur belongings back to you.
so now, my house's got 6 homestay. Samantha, Standley, Sandy, Kelvin, Rachel, Minnie and lastly a kid that i dont like whos just arrrived at my house. and again i wont blog about all the other homestays .. yet.. BUT wat ill do now is just tell u about this kid.

this kid. i call him 'fag' his kinda bold. i srsly dislike kids like that, and his greeting to me was dribbling all over my sexy jeans that i brought in china.. i got told to not hit him. X_X man, day and day is passing by slowly, i gota stand his shit man. my mando isnt good enuff so i cant really yell at him. every morgen, he screams and shit wakes everyone in the house up and says he doesnt wanna go to skool cosh he misses his dad. WTF grow up ==' i know i cud be mean, i cud be doing the same wen i was young but he doesnt deserve any pity i rkn. cosh hes an annoying kid. he turns my light off wen im playing piano.. and dont even get me started gah... he commands my mum, swears at my auntie..YES he said 'cao ni ma' to her.. i srsly wud slap him accrosss the face and make him eat onion till hes lips burns its skin away! ahh ==' 

yes i know, mum has her reasons to get this kid over in our house obviously.. cosh im sure if its someone else, my mum wud much rather kill them asap before they even gets the chance to be rude. 

ahhh fck.. i woke up at 3.38 last night. soo tired..


dad's coming back tmr for mums bday. tmr will be a happy family day i guess. excluding uni TT..

song of the Day: kana nishino - Dear..