-i lost-

well jesus took 3 days to revive..

i took 3 days to give up everything..

chances are less then 0

no one will spare me mersy

all i have left is the illusions while i rest,

if im lucky enuff, ill see them, if not, NILL.

i fink the candle had just finish burning,

visibility is no longer available in my sight.

i do not see a clear view of my future anymore.

does anyone really know the feeling of this?

patients.. is what they all say,

but nightmares are striking continuously.

is everything i done worthless?

what did i get out from all this..

just a few words saying 'you understand me'

or 'bffl' ... am i not trying hard enuff?

will it all end up back like last year, 

all i do is sit and wait.. and wait..

i never had believed in mircles..

not until i met you. well thats what i thought,

im just fooling myself the whole time.

thinking ahead of myself, making stupid decsions.

ask if i regret, i wudnt be able to answer it..

let me be..

this reunited feeling im getting from you,

will soon be official and i know it will get worse.

far more deep then the one before.

will i be able to counter it like the past?

or will i sink to the bottom of the ocean,

hoping the moment will once again arrive.

tbh, there isnt much happy endings in life.

not that i know of anyway,

it has always ended up like this.

i recieved: hatred, betrayal, untrustworthy and tears.

maybe a emotional-free smile.

i lost.. again..

song of the day: Gazette - Before I DECAY