Thursday, April 1, 2010

-noon to sunset-

ask me if i had fun today? ill answer yes. definitly. it was my last day of uni before easter holiday. finally i could take a nap. it is not just relaxing, but such a relief. i dont think i have been this stressfree (even though ill be having exams straight after easter holiday) since preschool... everything seem to unravel itself. however, i was late into my lecture.. so are my friends so it wasnt too embarrasing. i was very hungry however, ate cerial in the morning.. thats bout it and my stomachs just rumbling the whole time and the person next to me can literally hear it.. *embarrased* i then skipped my tutorial.. being rebelous now.. ive actually never wagged in my previoud school life and somthing just got in my head and boom... im doing it now and it sure feels.. great haha..

i got to city at like 11.15. no one was there asual. lucky my friend who was at my lecture also wagged with me. we went up to cue city, it was not very packed, which is good. less pressure no need to show off. tbh, its hard not to :P i beat my friend 4-0 in pool. ha ha.... i feel like more atm.. nyways. she then had to go to bustop so i walked her there. i then went to kfc, gave hayden lo a call. he picked up and told me hes actually nearby aswell. such a coincident.. blah.. met up with him. lifted up to tops, funhouse. us two facing the DJ max techonica machine. i hopped on, plugged in my headphones, setup to look like a pro. hey but guess what, i pulled out a .. beginners ._. card and inserted to the machine and selected normal level. I OWNED (H).. fullstop again.

Hayden then had to leave home so in no time i just decided to go back to cue city to see if the weekly city bums are there. hey guess what again. no one was there still but venus appeared at table 14. she was being companied by her friend. i realised somthing cheaky going on tho but i wud like to keep it in for now :) so i just yeh.. awkwardly said hi to venus and sat down. i took out my fone to pretend to be tlking on it for like 10 second before i actually realised i have to give aaron a call.. but anyways hahaha... (dont u just get those siolent awkward moments wen u and ur friend's convo just dies? and the best way to solve it is to get ur phone out and pretend ur on it HAHAHA.. it works..) i sat there. didnt do shit all.. some other friends came, chat chat chat. bs bs  bs. la la la.. akdjf;alkdjf;k its 1.28 wen i last saw the time. venus then had to leave to go uni. she stormed out the area and began heading the exit. she looked at me.. immediately i just had the most randomist and gutfull idea popped in my head. i hand signaled her (can i come) <--- lol i wonder how'd u do it with h.signals..she nodded* it was shocking but yeh. i did it and i jumped up, said bye to others and raced behind her. on the way to her busstop i was just trying to not make things awkward.. make lame jokes as usual and try get her to smile haha.. it wasnt long after i tried doing so i saw the first sunrise of the day hahaha! she smiled! but anyways.. try not spend too much time on her 'smile' moving on.. so it was just me paying her out, stop tlking, tlk again whilst walking. the cycle continued throughout the journey to the busstop.

My original idea was just to bus on the same bus as her and get off at garden city since my cars parked there. i asked the bus driver "does this bus stop at garbo? near garbo?" answer was "no".. hey guess what AGAIN.. i stayed on .. i had shit nothing running thru my mind at that point, all i wanted was to be with her.. i sat down next to her, met her friends (awkwardly as usual) and stayed quiet. i kinda tried tlking to her..  but it somehows always end up with me teasing her and she ignores me.. then again and again blhablhablah... she then borrowed my iphone.. yes she cud work one haha.. she was figiting around with it and finally played one song: Jessica Jarrell ft. Rob Allen - Watcha Doing.Great song ay haha.. just the right one to remind me of HER when shes right infront of me.. we stayed siolent once the song started playing. sat there  till we got to her uni. she  took headphones off and we hopped off the bus. i went into her lecture. 1 and ahalf hr of BS .. srsly.. BS!! i should get paid for wat i did today. i basically sat there, help her  take down notes while she mucks around with my iphone.. wat kinda gf retard does  that aye? like using me!! haha ... was a fun time tho... never even thought i wud spend time with venus like that today, speshally in a lecture room. haha.. weird.. i fort i made everything awkward too..

After the lecture, we were waiting for the bus. somthing very very funny/ memorable happend.. a lil butterfly flew against her arm and planted itself there.. i was like "0o" *points* she goes AHHHH get it off get it off! what is it with a '><' face.. i rofled and im like uhh... i shall flic...wait.. do u wanna see it first? *she looks over slowly* and *SCREAMS* >< >< >venus? you know how when u see someone infront of u right. you know that they act totally different at home but u sorta accepted who they are due to how the appeal to others? and at that time.. i kinda saw the real her haha... somthign that i cant explain by words.. oh one more thing.. her eyes are soo 0.0.. BIG!!.. very attractive.. yet includes a sense of evil in it when she glimpse at u hahah.. i like it :)

Well last part of the story, we're on the bus again, i chose the long way by busing with her. listening to music. seeing her 'trying to get to sleep'. i know she is thinking about heaps of things. i tried asking but i failed miserably. like even tho ive made her feel a lot more comfortable but she just dont seem to be open enuff to me .. just yet... maybe again.. im just not the right person to tlk to.. or shes scard.. of me? haha i dont know.. i just did my best try to make stuff less awkward and yeh.. flows.. it kinda did.. thanks to the music haha.. and damn.. those shitty old r&b i use to listen to does kick in some shitty memories haha.. however i liked it tooo.. i didnt only just rmred nightmard memories.. i've got a piece of memeory right beside me.. this feeling is just... i havent experienced in ages.. im kinda lil concerned tho.. is she really the one? or am i just thinking too much.. we got off at her busstop and she gave me a 'half' hug and went home; i walked the opposite direction.

lalala got home, piano then went to kareoke for ROSINA's 18th bday. i kinda forgot her present xD haha.. but anyways.. i lost my voice from singing too much.. ate shitloads of cake which was awesome. saw heaps of ppl and dicks :P but overall it was a good party :)!!! and once again.

on the way home.. i was driving down mains road  (and YES I TOOK IT WHILE DRIVING.. dont report me >_>) i just had a random fort about everything happend today. i started off with a retarded relaxing today, to a day full of exitment and miseries, to a day back to just be being alone again. i realised my days are actually like this everytime. its a cycle. ill always end up being by myself... the feelings i had is just really the surface of the skin, it doesnt really get into the inner layer part of it. becoz that part is set for me and me only.. i really wanna know wat im reallying looking for in my life.. love? uni? family? friends? anything... just tell me and answer.. just like the photo, ill never find out wats infront of me untill i really experience it.. right now.. all i can do is assumptions and hope for the best.. well.. yeh.. wish everyone a happy EASTER :)

Song of the day: Utada Hikaru - Merry X'm Mr. Lawrence

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