Friday, April 16, 2010

-populated mind-

whats going on now? tbh. i dont know. so many things has been coming in and out. on one side she shows me this msg. on the other she is cold as ice. whats really making me worry all the time? im craving for many answers. 


not worth it? tbh. i dont know. its been a while since ive been trying to get close with her. from tlking via internet to going into her lectures. i gave up the time, money and effort to 'earn' what i think i might recieve.


giving up? tbh. i dont know. its been soo long and she has also told me shes not the right one for me.. i also thought about to giving up a million times but i always end up taking everything back. is giving up really the solution?


moving on? tbh. i dont know. they always say, dont give up the forest for a single tree. i know that. but dude, this tree is what i rkn is really worth giving up a forest for.. i could be wrong but i dont wanna think that either.

find someone else? tbh. i dont know. neptune is also close to me. but i have this major barrier infront of me. well a few.. ill talk about it later. in terms of venus or neptune.. i cudnt pick. how can i resolve this?


go solo? tbh. i dont know. however it is my wish to just stay single and not think about all this random shit.. its just that whenever i have enuff sake to move on or stop this whole thing, a new planet comes into the solar system.


ask for help? tbh. i dont know. even the closest buds i have is having his own troubles. i really dont wanna give them more pressure. some are available but then for certain reasons, i just cant discuss with them. 

what do you want? tbh. i dont know. what i really wanted isnt gonna happen and i know it wont. im thinking about walking in different directions and live 'happier', it will not come true that easily.
 
song of the day: Shoko Nakagawa - Ray of Light

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